‘Twas the Night before Salvation
by Schwerelos
Summary: Just before the final encounter, Lloyd feels weak and confused. But that's what fathers are for, to give you back your strength. [Oneshot]


I come back from the shadows... and with a ToS fic n-n'' hahah. Well, this is a Kratos/Lloyd father-son oneshot that I just couldn't resist writing. I'm sure there are plenty of these out there but personally I can't never get enough of them. Their relationship is so amazingly angsty! T.T I finished the game just a week ago and the ending broke my heart completely... and now I am on pain and writing stuff like this! x3 I hope you hurt, err, I mean, I hope you like it as much as I did :P

Oh, I almost forgot. Little spoilers, but I'm sure most of you have already finished the game, right? And,Lloyd's PoV. But it is pretty much obvious.

**Disclaimer**: Tales of Symphonia belongs to the wonderful Namco. The End.

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'_Twas the Night before Salvation_

It was dark. Not only outside, but in my heart as well, darkness reigned. I couldn't sleep. My mind was way too distraught with everything.

I closed my eyes once and again, but it just didn't work. My comfortable bed wouldn't help me rest for now.

I stood, giving up. I reached the balcony and gazed at the stars. And one name popped into my head. Instinctively, I looked down, careful not to fall, and there, in front of mom's grave was d—him.

I stayed there watching him for a while. He looked so calm I could sense his muscles were relaxed, but I knew he would be prepared the moment anybody dared bother him.

I shrugged, telling myself I didn't care, but it was a lie. I sat on my bed and as soon as I blinked, his face showed in my mind, haunting me, calling me.

Exasperated, I decided to go down. I tried to make as little noise as I could; I didn't wanna wake dad or the rest of the gang.

I peeked outside for just one second and he already knew I was there. He turned around and then returned to his previous position, his eyes apparently fixed on the tomb.

I sighed. The man was impossible. Which enraged me even more because I cared so much.

I was thinking of that selfish, grim, exasperating trai—no, he was no longer a traitor. I never wanted to consider him that way. He was… And I was… _Ahh_…

That sound seemed to bring him back to reality, as he breathed in and out notoriously, walking up to me after that.

I froze, watching him come to me. Like many other nights we had talked together and shared little things and all those times he never told me – he never told me.

He never, for one second, thought that I had the right to know.

_Selfish Seraphim._

"Lloyd…"

His voice adjusted to the atmosphere; not too loud, not too quiet either.

I heard him call me perfectly. Hearing my name from him every time since I found out that… Agh, the nerve of this guy! I was mad at him for always leaving, and mad at me for always waiting.

All this time, I had waited. Against everything, all the odds, all I knew, all that happened.

I just kept waiting for my father.

I shifted my sight elsewhere –anything-. I suddenly felt defenseless and had the disturbing need of hugging him.  
Meh. I gave two steps forward, towards the entrance, staring at the nocturnal sky.

Out of the blue I remembered the fate that awaited me and all the weight that my shoulders carried.  
I tried to put a grin on my face and pose like I always do and just repeat that I could face it all. I tried to play the mantra that told me that I was powerful, that I could save the world if I didn't give up.  
There was nobody but him I could act to, and it wouldn't even work.

I was feeling so weak.

"Am I strong enough?"

Had I said those words? I didn't feel them coming out my mouth. I felt so numb, confused and overwhelmed… It wasn't like me to feel like that.

"Yes. You are"

He walked up to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. And I felt like crying.

"How would you know?"

I was furious all of a sudden.

"You defeated me"

Silence. I was angry, puzzled, hurt, and vulnerable.  
I defeated him? It didn't feel that way.  
I felt beaten by him oh-so-many times.

Every time he –_left_–.

The dark plum sky suddenly seemed attractive and I caught myself staring at it for seconds, minutes? I had lost all sense of time.

"You know you can do it Lloyd"

Do I? His voice still low, my ears perfectly hearing it.  
It had different effects on me.  
It could sooth me as well as it could annoy me.  
I had never expected it to be the voice I had always longed to hear.

To comfort me when I was in pain.  
To advise me when I was growing up.  
To cheer me up when I felt I couldn't go on.  
To tell me not to give up.

And now…

"I know you can do it…_son_"

I turned to see him. The last word hanging awkwardly in my ears and I in such shock as if it was the first time I heard it from him.

And I was just as disturbed, and just as upset as then.  
My hand closed in a fist, and it aimed at his shiny armor. Weak, desperate, needed.

My body lost all its strength, and it was falling down when he caught me.  
Embracing me. Telling me all I wanted to know with it.

I couldn't breathe.  
Tears started falling from my eyes.  
And I clung to him like a lonely child, being lost and having found his father.

…Which, I exactly was…

_Father_.

"You can do it son. I have faith in you. You are much stronger than me. You have the strength of not giving up. You won't run away.  
You will face your enemies with all you've got. And you'll succeed."

His voice cracked for only a second, but it was calm and kind. I just realized that he was never 'tough' and 'serious' when we were alone. His voice was just like of a father's.

If only I had noticed.

I held him tightly, soaking his armor with my suffocated tears. I cried for… I don't know. But it could've been hours. I didn't care. Just… being there, with him, reassured me and gave me back my faith.

"D—Kratos?"

He let me go and looked at me.

"You won't leave anymore, right?"

He smiled sadly. He didn't answer.  
I guess he didn't want to lie to me anymore.

I realized that for this time, I wouldn't care if he had to lie. I wanted him to tell me that he would stay.

_Dammit_!

"Tomorrow's… the big fight…"

I'm such a chicken. I wanted to tell him, I wanted to… I had to change the subject before my mind lost all control.

I hated him. I hated it all.

"Hmm… yes. Tomorrow you will finally face Mithos"

I let go and walked again. Noishe was supposedly asleep in his small house, so I was as silent as I could be.  
Noishe, however, had an incredible hearing ability, or wasn't sleeping in the first place, whining quietly once I passed in front of him.

I caressed his soft fur, trying not to think for at least a second.

"Did-did you once taught Mithos as you taught me?"

He approached, surprised at the question, I guess.

"He was very capable and talented. We practiced every now and then, and Yuan would mock him while his sister cheered for him. He learned very quickly…"

_Ouch_. Hearing that was not pleasing at all. And did I just felt jealous?

"Was he… better than me?"

He smirked. I glared.

"He was… different. Although he vowed doing everything for the world I felt how the power he received was consuming him. And when Martel died… he just lost it"

I shut my mouth, unable to comment on that. Losing someone you love is always tough. It's like one part of you disappears and you feel so empty and…

"There's no way he could be better than you"

I looked at him right in the eye, incredibly surprised-flattered-embarrassed for what he had said.

He somewhat smiled at my expression.

"You don't forget about the others. About the path you have walked. About the mistakes you have committed, and the promises you've made. That's the biggest difference between you two. And that's why you will win"

I breathed strongly. Sword techniques erasing from my mind, and I swear I forgot how to wield a weapon. It was too much.

I shook my head. _No, no, I am going to do this. I am going to take that twisted guy down and save both worlds._ There was no way I would go back right now

_I'm going to do it. And I would emerge victorious out of that fight_.

For the world, for Collette, for Genis and all my friends.  
For myself.

For my father as well.

I wanted… I wanted him to be proud of me.  
I wouldn't let him down.

I heard a small chuckle coming from him. I hadn't noticed I had gone on 'battle pose' right then.

"That determination Lloyd" I stared at him intently "is your best weapon"

I smiled. It felt awkward. After all, my spirit went through all these emotions like a roller-coaster.

"You will win"

"We will win. We're gonna do this, together"

His eyes opened wide in shock and then he smiled and nodded.

"I'm proud of you Lloyd"

One last tear fell down my cheek. I felt the words forming in my mind, something being released and I, at last, ready to pronounce them.

"Thank you, dad"

"Thank you… my son"

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Review, please?


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